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I am a Licensed Marital and Family Therapist who has worked extensively with couples at different stages in their relationships.

I also was a Teaching Assistant for Marriage 101 during my graduate school years at Northwestern University in Chicago.

It turns out that our elders believe there's something close to a "magic bullet" when it comes to deciding in a relationship: "Should I stay or should I go? But first, let's take a look at conventional wisdom. Look at Romeo and Juliet coming from two perpetually feuding families.

Or Tony and Maria in "West Side Story," one Polish-American, the other Puerto Rican, and as different as they are they can't resist one another.

The group stresses the importance of compatible partner selection and explores how lovers are frequently misled by sexual pleasure, excessive idealization, and hopes to solve unconscious problems.

The group discusses some expected marital challenges (managing children, in-laws, time, finances) and more serious problems (alcoholism, physical abuse, extramarital affairs).

I've spent time over the past year talking with young people about their hopes for marriage.

You're a single, professional woman, and you'd like to find a long-term partner.

On the surface, you'd think that finding a mutually rewarding and healthy relationship would be easy, but we all know it is not, and here's why: The pool in which you're fishing is shallow and poorly stocked, my friends. There are ways to locate a person who's a healthy fit - it takes time, patience, being deliberate and mindful in the process.




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