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In other words, Microsoft inadvertently created a racist, sexist, soulless robot that repeats back whatever horrible things you Tweet in its direction.If only they could figure out a way to get it registered for the Republican presidential race.I guess it becomes awkward, and if I’m honest, I’m not sure who started avoiding eye contact first – was it me?Out of shame for the heinous crime or lash out my son had befallen to their cherub; or was it them? Day after day, dropping off, picking up, feeding, making chitter-chatter with the smallest of people, there’s no beating around the parental bush, it’s isolating.

In a recent conversation with regards to moving Hugo’s school (not sure what I’m on about, maybe see here), the headteacher tentatively advised me that whilst Hugo’s behaviour seemed to be “on the up”, he’d made some solid friendships in the past few months, at this stage (year 5 in a primary school) the damage was done as far as reputation was concerned; the stigma has well and truly set-in in the minds of the parents. You think I don’t feel the glares at year 5 assembleys, the invisible force-field around me into which no other parent will step for fear that they too might become a shit parent not able to control their 10 year old, or, that I might lamp them one in a raging temper just like my offspring.

Knowing my son was the only one they hadn’t invited to the ‘big birthday party’ and hoping I’d be oblivious or nonplussed to the painful social rejection my son was now subjected to, as a result of his own poor, impulsive decisions on the playground. Did I send an incomprehensible blabbering message back? Knowing there’s a mum out there, who’s son is in thick of all that is Hugo, that knows all the really bad stuff and is still able to take a step back, realise both me and Hugo are not ogres, we’re trying to do our best, but sometimes things don’t go to plan – fucking rocks!

It’s a collective isolation – not one of ‘ can induce this parental purgatory – like a pack of wolves shunning a fellow pack member due to a weakness, it takes the stronger, gobbier few to turn their backs and the rest follow suit for fear of being rejected themselves. Please be mum, the one that sees another with a tear in her eye, struggling in a sea of other parents- step up and put the kettle on; don’t be a dickhead mum, cos afterall, no one likes a dickhead mum – not even other dickhead mums!

Have you ever wondered what a conversation would be like with a purely logical artificial intelligence? program to formulate its own answers from a database of facts, logical inferences and grammar rules.

While you may enjoy more frivolous exchanges with Cleverbot and other chatbots, the majority of their replies are in reality drawn from a database of human-written answers. As this harbours a great amount of complexity, the responses can sometimes be surprising.




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