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In an early interview study, many sexually compulsive individuals described a numb, detached, or trance-like state where an overpowering drive seems to take over.

Left without a legitimate diagnosis, those suffering do their best to get help for a problem without a name or consistent description. And sex addiction is more than just spending too much time at the mall and calling yourself a shopaholic, or eating too much Godiva and calling yourself a chocoholic.

It also makes a quick encounter feel way more intimate, so don’t fast-forward past foreplay. Five minutes of ho-hum missionary on your pillow-top bed probably won’t knock your socks off. When you’re trying to get in the mood ASAP, your brain can help get the rest of you on board.

"Fantasizing spurs a physiological sexual response because your body replicates what it’s envisioning in your brain," Britton explains.

But sex addiction is particularly hard to talk about (agh, double entendre alert! Here’s how to tell if your sex life is ruining your actual life. If having many partners adds to your life or spending a lot of time or money on sex is in line with who you are, there’s no issue—life and sex are congruent.

) because it quickly gets into the realm of moralizing. But if sex and the pursuit thereof takes away from your life, like taking up lots of time or causing a preoccupation with sex that leads you to neglect relationships, friends, family, work, or school, then we have incongruence, which equals a problem. You have unrelenting urges that require immediate gratification, but what’s more, you act upon the urges without thinking about consequences.




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The men involved were Ray Travers, 20 and his brother Jackson, 18, (left main) who were charged on July 27 for the murder of Peter Hofmann, 68.


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On how common dating app use is, and who's using them Michael Rosenfeld: "The apps are really common — Bumble is one of them, Tinder is probably the biggest one.