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“The more inventive you are with location,” Wygant adds, “the easier it is to get deep with someone who might be a little less socially adept.” While it’s tempting to think that a foray into comparing former flames will get you two bonding fast, it’s generally not a good idea during an early date.

“I find that if I stop trying to draw out the most reticent man and just sit through the silence—by God, he becomes downright chatty.” Conversations have a beat, just like music, and if you tune into someone else’s tempo and let him or her set the pace, you’ll be perceived as a truly sensitive soul.

Actually meeting the person you are talking to is one of the most important steps to online dating.

You want to talk with them and if things go well meet them.Okay, so you’ve established that your date is a lawyer. D., author of Instant Persuasion: How to Change your Words to Change your Life (lauriepuhn.com). Truth be told, most people’s daily lives aren’t rife with excitement, so dwelling on reality doesn't always make for the most scintillating conversation. ” territory with comments like, “I sometimes wonder what I’d do with my life if I won the lottery. ” or “If you had to find a new profession, what would it be? If you realize that’s OK, you might actually make even more of a connection.” Conversation like this gets at someone’s dreams and desires, and even if these things will never come to pass, you’ll get to know what makes this person tick. “Pick a group of people nearby and ask, ‘What do you think is going on with them? “Men, especially, tend to be comfortable with silence,” says Helen Fisher, author of .You also want to find out a little about your would-be mate's history and current interests.Without knowing what to ask or say, you could spend weeks or months with someone that isn't right for you.




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